Have I Been Gone That Long?

Well, ladies, once again I got sucked into the vortex of real life and have been missing all of you very much. I still owe Linda Jo her birthday prezzy, since May 19 was her birthday and I still have not mailed it. sigh. What happened? Nothing incredibly exciting, just working.

School is out now and both girls are home and working. Grandma is doing better and the doctor took her off of most of her meds now. When we got her home with us last June she was taking about 15 different medications. Now she is taking 3. The doctor who was treating her in Florida has lost his medical license. I was not surprised to hear that news. I can't bear to think about what might have happened had we not gotten her away from him. No one has to tell me why our Medicare system is broken. I know why it is broken. Doctors like him who made little old ladies take blood transfusions they don't need and put them in the hospital 15 times in 3 years when they didn't need to be hospitalized.

I wish I had a photo to post for you but I don't. Or, maybe I do.

Ahhhhhhhh, now don't we all feel just a little bit better now?

I am in total NCIS withdrawal right now. I keep going to surfthechannel.com and watching all the episodes in sequential order over and over again. I'm so afflicted. What a silly thing at this age.

My peonies just bloomed. Life is good.

I thought celebrity crushes ended somewhere around 17.
I guessed wrong.

Ice Fishing, Anyone?

hint: Turn off the music on my slide show over on the left of the page so you can enjoy the "down home" tune I chose for this video.

Men will be boys and they are all 14.

I didn't see any women in any of these photos. Did you?

So Much Has Happened Since Our Last Visit

May I please brag? Just a teensie weensie itsy bitsy bit? Please, oh please, oh pretty please?

(I am such a good whiner)

On Sunday, the day after my birthday and before the post two down that we will never mention again, my baby girl was inducted into the National Honor Society. I know, big deal, right? It is a big deal to me. I never made it into NHS, and, besides, it was the 70s and I was more into, well, other things. (I have pics that you will never see while I am alive but I think that the statute of limitations has run on most of that stuff)

I told my kids that they only had one goal in high school, well two goals actually. Goal #1: Chastity and Goal #2: National Honor Society because it is money in the bank when it comes time for scholarships to be handed out.

Laura is the last of my Mohicans and every single one of our kids got into NHS. Whew!

My work here is done. I can hang up my cattle prod once and for all. Now we can go and visit some colleges over the summer and see what she wants to do. Whatever it is, it will be expensive and I still owe her sister for, well, that thing we are not to mention.

Here are is just one pic from the ceremony. I know....it's about as exciting to read this as watching someone else's vacation slides or looking at pics of someone's new baby. Too bad. Look at it anyway.

LOOK WHAT LINDA JO DID!!

When I got home from work last Friday there was a package waiting for me from Linda Jo. I wondered why she had asked me for my address. I thought maybe she was sending me an invite to come to Texas to enjoy some warmer weather. I opened the package and look what she made for me!!! Linda Jo, did I tell you it was my birthday?

She even found something that had my name on it!
It's difficult to see, but it's right below the pink rose in the left lower corner of the pic above.

And look at this sweet "Wish" ticket, the velvet leaves and velvet rosebud.

Linda, how did you know!!!!!


And the vintage ledger had the date February 21 on it.
Amazing.

Now, I am going to say this and I don't want to hear anyone go "poor baby" because
this gorgeous birthday card just totally made my birthday.

Linda Jo, this was the only birthday gift I received. I did get a card from Shabby Hubby and I got a card from a girlfriend. Your beautiful and thoughtful gesture meant more to me than any other gift I could have received. So the absence of gifts and cards was not felt because I just keep looking at this with such deep gratitude for your awesome thoughtfulness. It is the bestest, mostest special thing I think I have ever received.


Thank you so much! I could just hug you real hard!!!

I will admit that for my birthday, my girls and I did go to the 11 PM showing of "Taken". Gotta love that Liam Neeson. Good movie for you girls who love "quality kills". Ummmm, that would be me. ;)

"Full Metal Jacket"....one of my all time faves. I never have been a chick flick lover, in spite of my pinktabulous reputation. Unfortunately, I have raised two girls who love this type of movie as well.

Their first choice was to take me to the midnight showing of Rocky Horror Picture Show but when they found out that I saw it in the 70s, that idea lost it's appeal. They wanted to shock me and have the other moviegoers tease me. When I started spouting off the lines from the movie, the songs and the audience participation lines, they decided that instead of them embarrassing me, I would end up embarrassing them.

I am very tardy in getting photos of this beauty posted so that you could all see Linda Jo's lovely work.


Thankfully Linda Jo's beautiful gift arrived BEFORE what happened in the post below.

After you look at the post below everyone say together "oh, bless your heart you poor thing".

You may now commence with your feeling sorry for me. It's not my fault that my daughter decided not to continue keeping collision coverage on her insurance.

LOOK WHAT I CAN DO!!!!



DID I MENTION THIS WAS MY DAUGHTER'S CAR?

Lends new meaning to the phrase "I should have just stayed in bed".

My fault.
Her car.
She is still crying.
Not repairable.
I got the ticket.
(cuss word)

You heard me. I said cuss word.

YEAH, RIGHT......

I was happily, well maybe not so happily, working at my office today when I received a telephone call from college daughter. She called to tell me that she and her roommate had been thinking about something while eating in the dining hall. That is never a good thing. It usually means I am about to write a check.

Anyway, the two of them decided that since daughter is not getting any scheduled hours at Chili's and roomie only makes a few bucks a week working on campus that the two of them will now work for me.

Excuse me? Doing what?

Now, please excuse the language here, but I am going to quote these two "young ladies" in the exact verbage that they used when they called me. "Mom", Katie said, "We want to be your _itches." The missing letter is not a "w".

How do you respond to that? "My what?!!!!" She repeated the exact same words quoted above, omitted letter included in her statement.

Oh my. "Is that how I taught you to speak?"

I had to ask for a specific definition of what she was saying, or asking, I'm not sure which it was.

She informed me that she and Stacy would come to my office and do work for me and they would come to the house and clean it once a week and also help to start reorganizing the basement so that I could get back to my creating.

Sounds good, but when she started to explain what they wanted to do I started daydreaming about me walking down Michigan Avenue in downtown Chicago without a care in the world, fur coat flying out behind me in the breeze (I do not own a fur coat) with these two idiots running behind me trying to keep pace with me as they are carrying all of my packages. I mean, isn't that what "_itches" do for their employers?

And where did that title come from anyway?

Back to reality. I don't shop on Michigan Avenue unless there is a sale so forget about that.

"Oh, so what's the catch?"

"You will pay us."

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh" (I knew it would involve a redistribution of wealth). sigh.

"How much do I pay you?"

"Well, we need to have a sit-down."

At this point, blogpals, I am losing it. I am laughing so hard that I can't see and I couldn't catch my breath. I had to put the phone down and go to the bathroom or I was going to need to change my clothes. I was literally gasping for air.

So I gather my composure and asked when they would like to have this "sit down". OMG, I can barely keep myself under control while I am waiting for her answer.

"Well, Saturday is Valentine's Day and I might have a date. I have a big exam on Monday so I need to study all weekend, except Saturday of course. Maybe we could get together on Sunday and you could take us to lunch so we could have a break from studying." She went on to tell me that she and Stacy do not have classes on Tuesdays and they could work for me on Tuesdays.

"So you are going to input data into my Excel program and clean the house and do all the other things I need done and get it all done on Tuesdays?"

"No", she says, "When we don't have other things to do on the weekends, we can do work for you because Stacy has track meets on Fridays or Saturdays most weeks."

"I see. So you can only be my _itches at your convenience. I don't think that is very professional, as _itches go. What does it say in the Professional _itch manual?"

THIS IS MY 21 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER!!!!! Have a sit-down so I can buy these two knuckleheads lunch so they can tell me how much they want me to pay them to be my _itches when they feel like being my _itches?!

This is too hysterically funny not to follow through with the sit-down. I have to find out what they are really up to.

Personally, I think they want to go someplace for spring break (over my dead body) and they are trying to figure out how they are going to finance it (again, over my dead body).

Oh, I forgot to mention that Katie told me that part of her "pay" could be my paying her cell phone bill and car insurance (insert "over my dead body" here). Did I ever tell you how much Katie's cell phone bills can be? Her first one ever was $800. No, I haven't paid her cell phone bills in a long time.

So, if I have "_itches", have I finally arrived? Am I finally affluent?

Anyone want to start a pool to see how long this lasts? This is the child who lives in her on campus apartment but has a room here she can't keep clean.

Maybe I should have danced all night.....